Enigma of hurt, anger and violence!

Emotional hurt.

Physical hurt is, ordinarily, a temporary affair. The pain finds a plateau and subsides. Emotional hurt is like skeletons in an empty box. A blow of air, a shift in pace or a stumble on a perceived step, anything can cause carrion to rattle. Hurt turns inward as despair or depression. Hurt, when reflects outwardly, it is an anger for catharsis. That is good part of it, if there is anything good in it. The worse is that cinder of hurt keeps burning inside charcoal of despair or depression and looks for next opportunity of catharsis by anger or violence. What causes emotional hurt? People? Society? Illogical people? Injustice? Illness? Failure (whatever that means to an individual)? Physical deformity? Other’s success (whatever that means to an individual)? Other’s failure?


The last one is most serious. We can be dismayed at others. We may not like others. We may judge others yet we can be hurt by the judgement of a person who is “failure in life” or a person of judged “low morals”. Why? Such person should be of no consequence. Why bother about gyrations of another person, especially the one who is a failure in our eyes?
Cactus in springs of warmth.Actually answer lies in the structure of mind. The so-called ‘feeling of hurt’ or despair is a thought structured on a pyramid of other thoughts/memories. A mind ‘without thought’ does not exist. But a thought is like a fish without water. It needs anchor. An anchor to anything. Thought or memory, both are same. It knows only to cling. It keeps on clinging and result is what we call ‘chain of thoughts’. It will find anchor where-ever it can find, there is no priority of order in selecting the reason for hurt and despair.

Movement of mind

The strange movement of mind is that we get hurt about other’s ‘perceived’ views about ‘ourselves’. In other words if Mr. X relent his views about Mr. N, I can be hurt by identifying with my intelligence that I am ‘Mr. N’.

How and why it happens?

Because mind is always in judgement about itself. Mind has an image of it’s being and no one can trample upon that image, accidentally or intentionally. (Also called false vanity.) The image is a structure or pattern of thought. Any person removing/altering/interfering any structure or any stanza from that thought is guilty of blasphemy. Resulting feeling is: Let us kill that bastard. Let us kill all such bastards. That may be anger but it is camouflaged in reasonableness. It has basis in ‘logical’ thinking; as much can be found in a loop. That is also the justification for terrorism. The Anger continues. The ember inside keeps finding new people to abuse, stone, kill, bomb or to nuke.

That is the structure of mind till we see how it works and realize how ethereal is hurt and pain, fueling anger and violence. Only then any change is possible. Otherwise we continue to exist in loop of thought/hurt/pain and suffer while making all around us suffer as well.

© Sandeep Bhalla

6 thoughts on “Enigma of hurt, anger and violence!

  1. Hi Sandeep,

    Great thoughts. What jumped out at me are the following lines,

    “Because mind is always in judgement about itself. Mind has an image of it’s being and no one can trample upon that image, accidentally or intentionally.”

    So what is it that we can do to neutralise this “judgement” mindset? Could this be done by removing our attachment with the situation or person ? And where does this attachment come from? When we start to dispute the reality of ” What is.” So what could we do to shift?



    • Thanks for joining Shakti,
      First: Why the mind is the way it is. It is a product of conflict, wars, survival and more wars. It has to be self conscious otherwise it meant death, not an issue now.
      Second: What we can do about it?
      Nothing and everything. First of all we should recall one incident, when we were about to hit some one out of anger and restrained ourself. What happened then? We could see the anger coming and futileness of hitting. It happened in a flash. Now if we keep track of movement of mind i.e. if we are aware/conscious of what we are thinking, at all the times we can see the anger from fall ahead. If we can see that coming we can choose to energize or not to energize any given thought. Once we see it all clearly, the automatic connection of thought and action is broken and that is the end of it. It is a package deal. Removing thoughts about ‘judgement’ alone is not possible because thoughts are a web or a network of our action. We can start from one thread and we will eventually find the entire network.
      I would suggest that you may read about few other posts, here like ‘Automatons’, Evolution and devolution’ etc.
      I am here if you need me.
      All the best.


      • These intricacies about mind are so fascinating. The “mind” being brought to bear on the mind is not for everybody and is, in my field, technically a very schizoid endeavor. But, by nature I have always been fascinated with these cerebrations and will not back off now!

        And, a further thought re “schizoid.” In my culture (the U.S.) we are taught to not think so critically, to not question our thinking, but to merely think and let those thoughts carry us along our way. And that contributes to the “unexamined life” that one of the Greek philosophers warned about.


      • Life is unexamined everywhere now.
        Psychiatry is the latest religion which is closed to new ideas. Btw observation of mind is last step of ‘Meditation’ if there are any steps. Curious as I am, do you ( in USA) have psychiatric practitioners for pets also?


Please share your views.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.