Raksha Bandhan or Rakhi and its lost meaning.

Date:

Today 2nd August 2012 is the auspicious day for Rakhsha Bandhan or Rakhi. This day is chosen on the basis of Indian Calender therefore its date as per Gregorian Calender differs. It falls on full moon day (Purnmasi) in the month of ‘Shravan’ as per Indian Calender.

English: A sampling of rakhis. Image by self -...

Meaning of Rakhsha Bandhan & Rakhi:

Raksha means ‘Protection’ and Bandhan means ‘Bond’. It is a vow but not a bipartite contract. It is a sentimental bond not a legally enforceable act or duty.
Rakhi is a thread which can be of silk or decorative or rather simple thread.
On this day a sister ties this thread called Rakhi on the wrist-arm of brother. (Generally right arm)

Object:

There are many tales. One is that tying the knot of Rakhi enforces the duty of brother who as a male is presumed to be superior in strength to protect the sister. It is also considered a symbol of affection of the sister for the brother, as both share sweets after tying the Rakhi.
Very often unrelated females also tie the rakhi on the wrist of male and thus proclaim him as brother. It is the only symbolic gesture in the world in which male and female can proclaim platonic, non-sexual emotional relationship. Very often this relationship crosses the religious boundaries. Though it is not so common in the cities where everyone has no time. But any where in the country if a male who is acquainted to the female and her family and he asks a female to tie him Rakhi, she will not refuse, irrespective of religion. A gesture of which no offence is taken. But like corruption elsewhere, rakhi brothers are no exception and incidents do occur.

Lost Meaning:

In childhood everything is a play. A joy. So is Rakhi. In adolescence every ritual looks strange and performance is with indifference. The real test of this bond takes place when siblings are settled in own house-hold respectively. It is further put to test when the distances are wider. Different town or even different countries. Actual test is that: Do they keep track of each other? Sending Rakhi by post by sister and brother sending money by wire or cheque even along-with gifts is not within the spirit of the bond.

Life has become a never ending chase in which time is getting rare. No time to eat, relax or even to rest or sleep. Who has time for mundane relationships. Rakhi was a good way to keep the siblings to meet and share their life, problems, joys and what not. It was a reason to get together once in every year. It also gave the female a chance to visit her parents else the brother will visit the sister and inquire the welfare of married sister and her house-hold.

Now it is just a ritual. Unless the sister is newly married, rarely a sibling would travel to another city for Raksha Bandhan. Within city it is ritual which is a rigmarole of visits. Husband and wife would be keen to get over with it. A quick visit here to wife’s sibling, may be over lunch. A quick visit there, to husbands sibling, may be over a cup of tea. And may be more visits to cousins, so just sweets. See you next time. Be well. Keep alive. Ritual is over and We are too tired and exhausted. Thank God He or She did not keep me waiting from morning to evening like last year. I would not do this next year. I would do something different on type of rakhi or sweets or lunch or something else mundane. I have no time to look at the face of my sibling silently or ask him/her if he/she has any trouble. I have too many problems of my own. I will take care of my problems. For others there is God.

© Sandeep Bhalla

Pain, Pain, Pain and Relationships

Human relationships:

Nothing else seem more complicated than human relationships. Every single person is impregnant with pain caused by relationships. The nature of relationship is irrelevant. One could be related by blood, marriage, carnal pleasure or just friendship; it is all the same.
Is it really so complicated? I do not think so. Our thinking process makes it complicated.
The only principle of fairness is Reciprocation. I must not do something to you, which I would not like you to do to me. The second part is returning the favour. So far everyone would agree.
The problem starts when we justify the departure from above principle on the ground of special or exceptional circumstances.
Thereafter the worst part arrives: Judgement of reasons. Yes I will judge your special circumstances and will find you guilty most of the times, if not always. You will judge my reasons and will decide against me.
What next? Retribution and revenge in the name of fairness. Manipulation, deceit, lies and treachery are elevated to justified means to achieve the object. Relationship becomes a war. Every interaction an opportunity to strike. Strange part is that it just start to happen almost spontaneously. Often in a spur of moment, in the face of opportunity.
Result is pain, more pain, even more pain. So what to do?

Say No

Say No Get out with simple straight forward ‘NO’. No is a very powerful defence if properly and selectively used. The moment we can see that we are being judged, say no and get out of there. And don’t judge others. Keeping affairs of life and relationships, simple, does help. This the general concept of solution and not a blue print to triumph relationship. Even otherwise Conquering is alien to living. Conquerors do not live. Only their campaigns live. They die the moment campaign is born.
Happy living.
Just another lazy Thought on lazy Sunday.